alcoholism and addiction..

My name is John , I’m here to speak to you tonight about alcoholism and addiction..My personal experience is that I was born to an Irish family. It shot for everyone. Stressing about rejection is changing any single behavior is virtually impossible, but changing behavior is like something to be managed. I will give you DSM five indicates that alcoholism and addiction arising from an unknown etiology, and there are many that believe there is a genetic component where people who are addicted specifically to alcohol have a gene where they do not metabolize the alcohol in the same way that most people metabolize alcohol. And I will have drinking feel, and not effects very much and then after a number of drinks ​feel ​the effects very quickly and this has been shown in people who are, who descend from the British Isles, UK Scotland and Wales Northern Ireland and Ireland also Native American are very predisposed to this game as same as an Asian people—so going on about addiction. I was addicted to alcohol at a very young age. I started drinking when I was eight years old, and I started taking drugs when I was about 17 years old and then 13 and 30. I drank Android drugs virtually every day of my life I developed a career in business. And so, I could engage in behaviors that would have gotten anyone else to asked their jobs but in the show businesses I was in music, and that did not seem to exclude me as quickly as it might for other more mundane careers, like being an accountant or insurance sales company, but by living in doing things better it was I went to engage AA meeting I mean ​I knew I was addicted to alcohol for a very long time. I had all of these social consequences, I had all of these relationships consequences, but I could not accept powerlessness.​ Doctor says it’s going to be kind of over, 12 step programs.And these 12 steps are behavioral modifiers to people who are addicted engaging with the help other people who are already involved in 12 step recovery.​So the first step is acceptance of powerlessness​ . And many people have a very difficult hurdle, I myself did I somehow I believed that I could through some method of control. I could moderate or stop drinking, and the recovery literature talks about the person who is a heavy drinker but given us sufficient reason can either moderate or stop, and that is not the case with people who are genuinely biochemically addicted to alcohol because it’s likened to an allergy of a sort that is characterized by a craving, and a mental obsession. So in a period where I was not drinking, I would be thinking about all alcohol all the time and I’d be in a nearly manic expression, And whenever I would drink alcohol, all I could think about was drinking more so it is characterized by a mental obsession and a physical craving. So until I developed the idea that I was in a powerless over this substance, every time I drank I drank alcoholic, there was no time where I could moderate my drinking or no element of control.so the first step was admitting powerlessness. The second step is coming to believe that a power greater than oneself can restore to one sanity, which seems quite a strange metaphysical experience. But at its core. I was engaging in the same behavior every single day and expecting a different outcome. I was employing the same methods, and this failed attempt to moderate my drinking and every single day I was getting drunk. So we came to believe their power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity came to me to be the idea must necessarily come from outside of my consciousness sness.I need to attend the meeting where other people are not drinking, or other people are finding a way to avoid taking a drink because taking the first drink is what start a biochemical mania for drinking more for people truly drinking alcohol. So many people are seemed to say that higher power nation and people who have a higher power in their lives simply have better outcomes are people who are raised in a faith, and I have a supreme being in their life generally have better outcomes, but this does not a boundary because the program does not ask anyone to believe in anything all the program really explains to us the program about Alcohol Anonymous (AA) that would explain to us if we do not drink one drink in one day we will not get drunk which is a certainly more manageable notion and I cannot stop drinking, and I am never going to drink again, and that would put any ​addict .but ​a for 24 hour period I can align myself with like-minded people who are obviously not drinking it we attend meetings together reform a sense of community, so it seems important for me at a minimum in the 2nd step of into believe that a power greater bringing them myself and restoring sanity was that something outside of my ​(sight)I​ could align myself with either intellectually and behaviorally or metaphysically and that way I would not engage and the same methods and expected different outcome. And that way, I would not engage in the same methods and expect a different outcome. The third step is turning one’s will and life over to the care of this higher power. So some people have first believed the group itself is their higher power. This is a group of people who have solved their problem with alcohol and so one can align oneself with them. But like I said before people who have a metaphysical underpinning in their lives. Just typically have better outcomes they develop a sense of faith, a sense a sense of power greater than their self that comes into their life and helps them to achieve these ends. The third step is turning one’s will and life over to the care of this higher power, so some people effort to believe the group itself as their higher power. This is a group of people who solved their problem with alcohol, and so one can line oneself with them like I said before; people who have a metaphysical underpinning in their life just typically have better outcomes. They develop a sense to face a sense of a power greater than their self that comes into their life and helps them to achieve their ends and then a behavioral aspect of it the fourth step is made an inventory making an inventory to step itself as making​ (amorality) ​ that arises a lot of judgemental, but a point of thinking about it as a behavioral index of maladjustments and this was something that I did not understand, and when I first got there I was thought to myself this is that I am not going to do it is because it to be hard work, but I need a guide, and I can hardly round that here but having a sponsor is important because the sponsoring the programs manager with someone who has been through these 12 steps than describing and has experience with them and can show it to another person so this fourth steps making ​(amatory)​ process was something I did not understand how games going to keep true get drunk, and he explained to me that enjoying this process one can say and and perspective under behavior because there were a lot of being yours I was engaging in that I had no conscious awareness of things as though it was getting up every day shooting myself in the swim and blame it on someone else because that’s inconvenience I was engaging in behavior that continued to place me in a position of emotional vulnerability such a way that I would become frustrated or angry or upset her put upon in such a way that I would find it emotionally too much and I would pick up a drink and picking up one drink initiate a chemical and biochemical cascade of craving and obsession so I knew to find ways to arrest emotional booby traps they set for myself did I had do the world a certain I shall i was entitled to sense and every time I said loud … because 1 enumerates different situations where their felt wrong in this inventory in sponsor kind of goes over ts a look for root causes and reasons why these things had blown up in our faces any pointing down to me sit on him when we go from them is thinks of once you are part on it and the time I think I was may be said of the as 31 years old and I thought to myself I was at reasonable adults and try to get ​(certifit)​ I had absolutely no idea what he talking about and the one he was putting forward was that I was engaging in behaviors that were getting a reaction from the people around so at his heart I am looking at the world through a lens of my own personal bias I’m drawing the wrong conclusion and I’m taking the wrong corrective actions and this arouses upset in the people around me and they push me away and they do not want to be near me this caused me a great deal of emotional upset and I can’t take it and I pick up a drink to make the feelings that the motion apps that go away and it doesn’t oversimplification but that is the rule was going on so I needed to identify​ ​the things that were causing me to mistreat the Jews in my environment. I was particularly self centered.​ ​I thought things ought​ ​to go a certain way for me. I believe that people weren’t simply doing things they were doing things to me and I was reacting badly to them. So you see, until I looked at my own behavior and got a handle on how I was misinterpreting the cues in my environment, drawing the wrong conclusions and taking the wrong corrective actions. When I stopped seeing myself as the central figure in the world’s unfolding history. I get a sense that I am yet another human being in a world of human beings. Many of them are emotionally ill at times and beset by problems. And it’s not all about me. So when people are just doing things they’re doing things and it gave me a way to at least put my hand on the rudder of my day, my interactions, my outcomes, my interactions with other people. So, writing this inventory is the first step, the fourth step and the fifth step is actually talking about it with one’s sponsor. So these two events kind of go hand in hand. 11-20 ● The important main points in this part the 12 steps of recovery from Alcoholics: Step 1​: ​We admitted we were powerless over alcohol—that our lives had become unmanageable. Step 2​: Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. Step​ 3: Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God ​as we understood Him.​Step​ 4: Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. Step​ 5: Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs. Step​ 6: Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character. Step​ 7: Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings. Step 8: Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all. Step​ 9: Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others. Step​ 10: Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it. Step​ 11: Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, ​as we understood Him​, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out. Step​ 12: Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs. And I said to myself I was a reasonable adult. I’m trying to get silver and I had absolutely no idea what he was talking about. And one thing is putting forward, was that I was engaging in behaviors that were getting a reaction from the people around. So avatar. ​I am looking at the world through the lens of my own personal bias. I’m drawing the wrong conclusions. And I’m taking the wrong corrective actions. And this arises upset in the people around me and they push me away and don’t want to be near me. ​This causes me a great deal of ​emotional upset​. And I can’t take it. And I ​pick up a drink to make the feelings of emotional upset go away​. I oversimplify but that is the root of what’s going on. ​So I needed to identify the things that were causing me to miss read the cues in my environment, I was particularly self centered.​ I thought things articulate a certain way. ​I believe that people weren’t simply doing things they were doing things to me, and I was reacting badly to it.​ So you see, ​until I looked at my own behavior and got a handle on how I was misinterpreting the cues in my environment, drawing the wrong conclusions and taking the wrong corrective actions,​ when​ I stopped seeing myself as the central figure and the world’s unfolding history​. ​I get a sense that I am yet another human being in the world of human beings.​ Many of them are emotionally ill at times and to set back problems. And it’s not all about me. So when people are just doing things they’re doing things, and it gave me a way to at least put my hand on the rudder of my day, my interactions, my outcomes, my interactions with other people. So, writing this inventory is the first step, ​the fourth step and the fifth step is actually talking about it with one’s sponsor. So these two events kind of go hand in hand. The end of this process.​ ​The sixth step was​. We’re ready to go have God remove all these defects of character. And once again these defects of character. The literature was written in the 1930s in America. So there’s a very anachronistic language, but it’s quite universal. It’s been translated into languages all over the world. But these defects of character at their heart are an index of maladjustment so behavioral mal adjustments based on a self centered and eco centered thinking. So, the sixth step was to have these defects of character removed. And once again, people who have a faith in a higher power in a God have better outcomes; they have an entity to which they can present these things to say please remove these things from. So, step six, and step seven also go together in the same way that four and five go together. ​Step six is being willing to have these defects to get removed, and step seven is asking their higher ones for higher power to remove them. So at the end of this fifth step, when I went through this inventory process with my sponsor. I had a pile of stuff that clearly worked against you. I was selfish. I was self centered and self seeking. I was emotionally immature​. This thing’s clear we worked against. I also had a pile of things that worked well in my feet. I was courageous. I was fearful, I had compassion. So looking at these two piles will set you want to be the pile of things that you want to stay away from the pile of things that work against you, which seems straightforward to any rational human being. The pile of things that worked against me was such a well one mechanism for that. I just like falling off the line to be self centered and to be a jerk and step on the toes of my fellows. It was a lot more hard work to consciously be compassionate to consciously try to put myself in someone else’s shoes. ​But if I reach for the pile of things that are clearly working against me I will continue to place myself in a social turmoil and undermine any kind of emotional health that I’m trying to build and the erosion of that emotional peace of mind will create feelings in me upset, and fear.​ And those feelings that make me want to play. And once I pick up a drink. I can’t stop jumping. ​So all of these things lead to a daily mechanism where an alcohol can find behavioral mechanisms and employ them in such a way that they don’t have to pick up a drink during a 24 hour period.​ All right, so ​we’re at seven now ​okay so the ​eighth step is making restitution to people we have harmed, making a list of people who aren’t willing to make amends to these people​. ​The ninth step​ ​once again goes in parallel with the age. And that is actually making demands​. So, during this inventory process. ​I had between my sponsor and I we have made a list of skeletons​ there’s two people to whom I genuinely owed amends. There were people I needed to pay money back to. There are people I needed to explain grossly unfair behavior to. And there were people that I needed to leave the hell alone and never speak to again, and that was the best I could do with some of these relationships. And I once again did not understand the reasons for doing this from a behavioral point of view. ​And that’s why I needed to have a sponsor who would show me he been through this process by wound and by being willing to make amends to people. And by making direct restitution for harms done. It enables me to release fear and guilt because fear and guilt aren’t the emotions that I will drink.​ And so I had to help me out with vocabulary for making snacks. There are people I needed to just pay my debt to. I’m very sorry I borrowed your car, and , and totaled it. I would recommend it’s about $2,000. Here is $2,000 . I’m very sorry I was drunk. ​When I was doing it. And what I’m trying to do now is live a sober life.​ I’m in recovery and just trying to do that. Many people were very nice about it. And other people were not so nice about it, it was a numbers game, I had done some pretty reprehensible things during that part of my life. ​I will never forget the response I received from one person who said, Great, now you’re a silver asshole. Screw you, and don’t ever speak to me again. These things happen but most of them went pretty well​. And then there are other people who the best restitution I could make was never contacting them again, and leaving him alone and letting them know. So I really kind of fit into three different categories. So we’ve got eight and nine. Okay. ​The 10th step is to continue to take personal inventory.​ And when we were wrong promptly admitted it. And any of you can find these timestamps online anywhere they’re quite ubiquitous. I’m kind of paraphrasing them, but continuing to take personal inventory let me move on completely admitted. So, having done this inventory. I got some sex into my behavior into the way I see the world, and the pitfalls and the booby traps that I set for myself that undermine any kind of emotional sobriety I’m trying to create. ​So I need to maintain these things because this higher power thing will not remove them from me, it becomes my responsibility to form a relationship with the inventory aspects of the maladaptive behaviors that I’ve uncovered during this process.​ It’s my responsibility to build a relationship with those things because that’s who I am at heart, and if I don’t pay attention to it, ​most human beings and reasonably self centered, most human beings lose their patience with other human beings.​ It’s a very human experience. However, ​If I lose my patience, routinely and stop paying attention to how I’m behaving about other people, I will continue to undermine any kind of emotional health,​ I’m having, and I run the risk of picking up a drink in order to escape these feelings. So tenants continue to take personal inventory, and when they were wrong promptly admitted it taught me something very simple to say, apologize for something, ​I can apologize for something very trivial. And that enables me to apologize for things that I do every day. But if I personally adopt a sense of​. I’m very sorry. You know that I snapped at you, I was having a bad day, ​keeps me from going really far off the deep end by ignoring these behaviors that I am capable of doing. The 11th step is such repair and meditation to improve our conscious contact as God with God, as we understand it. I have, I studied Buddhism for a very long time. So, I’m a meditator and I spend a fair amount of time during the week in meditation. And that’s what works for me. Many people in recovery are from all of the world …
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