thinking versus doing in a conversation

You have just had a startlingly frank discussion with your significant other. All these years, you prided yourself on being such a good listener when, after a long conversation, you’re suddenly scolded, “You talk too much! If you’re not talking, you’re always on the verge of saying something. You never leave any space in that brain of yours to listen to a word I have to say ! If you’re not talking, you never stop thinking about what you’re going to say in reply. Why can’t you just be quite, empty your brain and stop planning your response long enough to hear what I have to say?”

You’re heart-broken as your self-image just takes a gigantic hit from the person you trust most.

You ask yourself, “Can it really be true? Me, the great listener, actually talks too much?”

For the purposes of this assignment, you’re going to assume it’s true. What’s more, you’re going to try to do something about it.

First, carefully read Chapter 7 in Communication Skills for Medical Professionals. Next, read the paper The Distinct Psychologies of “looking” and “leaping….”

Your post will consist of two parts.

In Part 1 of this discussion, write at least 250 words on how the idea of looking vs. leaping (or thinking versus doing, a.k.a, “assessment” versus “locomotion”) on how Kruglanski’s paper applies to listening versus talking during a conversation with a close friend or your significant other. Make specific references to the paper by Kruglanski about how you could aptly apply to a conversation the psychologies he speaks of. What insights might this offer that would help a poor listener (like you, supposedly) become a better one?

In preparation for writing up Part 2 of the discussion, take to heart all that you’ve learned from writing up Part 1 as well as from reading the chapter in your text. Have a conversation with a significant other or close friend while trying to apply these lessons, especially what you’ve learned about “doing” versus “thinking.” After the conversation, ask the person if they felt it was different from the other conversation they’ve generally had with you. If so, ask them how. If there was no change, how do you feel about this? Part 2 of the discussion should also be no less than 250 words. Please clearly label your responses at Part 1 and Part 2. They should be part of the same post, not separate entries.